Blogger: Michael Strange – “The No Filter Father”
When Janis asked me to write for The Daily Feels, I was honored. She wanted me to give some perspectives from a dad’s point of view. Other than writing a few lines on a status update or a text message, writing is not in my daily routine. I started to read some of the other bloggers and right away I knew I would be in some serious trouble. They were all smarter and better-looking people than me. I liked a lot of their styles, and being that I’m new, I thought I would copy Jessica, and start by telling you a little bit about me:
I met my wife online almost ten years ago. She is an amazing woman. She is the complete opposite of me. She was in the Peace Corps and she cares about other people (I do a little, don’t tell her…). She is a Liberal (I’m an independent but probably more on the conservative side). I knew I was going to marry her after the first date. She has no interest in pop culture (has never seen Jaws). She defriended me on Facebook because she does not like my posts, apparently, she does not like my sense of humor. Wait, why did I marry this woman again????
My wife and I lived in Manhattan for 6 years before moving to Connecticut. Nothing made me happier than giving a tourist bad directions or recommendations to really expensive restaurants.
Now let me give you a few details of my life today:
It’s 3AM in the morning. I’m sound asleep in my comfortable, warm king size bed. Then my five-year-old son Cameron comes into our room, he climbs up into our bed, he plops himself down hard enough to wake up my wife and I. He rolls around and makes himself comfortable, and typically takes up most of my side of the bed. He kicks me several times. I ‘m now wide awake, with just a little bit of space available to sleep. I could pick him up and bring him back to his bed, but I know that these nights will not last forever. I love the fact that he is lying next to me. This is one of the great moments of fatherhood. It was the hardest club I ever got into but once in you never want to leave. We all wish we could stop the hands of time with our children, they grow up so fast, One day you are carrying them everywhere, the next they are sort of independent kids that only need you for rides and money. As you watch them grow up you’re so proud of them, and what they have become, but you are also secretly wishing that you could read Good Night Moon to them one more time.
Everything in life is a compromise. We compromise with our partners, our kids, at work.
I try to make deals with my kids all the time. My wife doesn’t agree with it but I want them to eat their vegetables, and not have ice cream for dinner. So, if I say to them eat five more bites and you will get dessert, my wife gets mad at me, not in a bad way but she thinks it sets a bad example. She also thought me deep throating a banana in front of the kids was a bad example, and after little thought agreed. I know it will come back to bite me in my amazing ass in a few years when Cameron says, “if I eat the rest of my vegetables you have to buy me a new iPhone”.
Lately, I have been trying to work with them to clean up after themselves. Especially with their clothes. I find dirty, fucking socks all over the house, especially under the couch. Like why the hell did you actually stuff them underneath there? The clothes are everywhere in the house at times, they will learn where the laundry baskets are…I have decided with this there is no compromise to be made.
With my wife it is a little different, she “asks” if she can do something, knowing in advance that she is going to do it no matter what I say. Last week, for example, she wanted to go to the beautiful city of Hartford to see her friend get sworn into the state Senate and go to the inauguration balls. Spend the night up there. She worked a lot on the campaign and it is a passion for her. There was no way I could say no you can’t go. But on the flip side, she compromises with me and lets me watch football, play golf, go on golf trips. Everyone wants some away time, especially me but I understand there is a fine line in any relationship where neither participant should cross and take advantage of the other. I just wish kids understood this line instead of rewriting every time they want something.
At work here is the compromise: we probably don’t like our jobs, don’t like our pay, don’t like our bosses and the compromise is that you still have to go in. So, suck it up snowflake.
I’m going to change course here and rant and give you some opinions:
– I think texting is the lowest form of human communication but we cannot live without it.
Native New Yorker, now living in Connecticut. Husband, and father of two amazing boys. Kidney transplant recipient, and a big supporter of organ donation #donatelife. Mortgage banker, but not by choice. In my free time, I enjoy golf, reading (especially presidential biographies), and finding that hole in the wall restaurant that has great food.