Who remembers SNL in the 90s? Remember “Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy”? My friends in college and I would laugh our heads off at the hilarious things he would come up with! Here’s one of my favorites:
SO, now, how many of us have deep thoughts- funny or otherwise?! I know I do, and I thought I’d share some of them with you, because life is too serious a lot of the time…
- Do we EVER stop worrying about our kids? I mean, really- I know I get annoyed when I feel like my mother is all up in my business, but then I think-SHIT- I’m doing the same thing with MY kid!
- Sometimes I wish I could wave a magic wand to stop my husband from snoring. Like, maybe when I’d wave it he’d be transported to another room, or something.
- Even after eight years, my dog is still trying to win the friendship of my cat (who remains to be one of the nastiest bitches around). Why are dogs so smart, yet so stupid at the same time?
- Speaking of animals, isn’t it amazing how they can pick up on human emotions?! I swear that my dog is an undercover emotional support dog- I bet yours it, too!
- Marriage is like a game of tug-of-war. Sometimes you pull, sometimes you get pulled, and sometimes you both end up in a pit of mud (and sometimes just for fun, lol)
- People are always amazed at how I can bake and cook. For me, baking and cooking are like chemistry experiments, and I have fun putting different ingredients together and seeing how it turns out. I guess maybe other people think of baking and cooking like this, too- except they were REALLY bad at chemistry in school, and they’re just reliving bad experiments every time they cook…
- The Instant Pot is neither instant, nor a pot.
- There’s a meme I’ve seen on Facebook that says, “If I was a Jedi, there’s a 100% chance that I’d use the Force inappropriately.” I TOTALLY would. The moment I’d get pissed off, I’d start lifting people off the ground by their throats using the Force!
- When a person is upset about something, and someone is trying to comfort him/her says, “I understand”- I wish that the person who says that could be instantaneously transported into the mind of the person who is upset, so that they could really understand. I don’t like when people use that phrase as a method of trying to comfort someone. Even if I’ve gone through the same situation as you, I STILL don’t understand what or how you’re feeling, because I’m me and you’re YOU. Just stop it with that shit (that’s not a funny one, but still something I think about)
- Smartphones really ARE smart…at making some people stupid.
- Sometimes when I’m watching a show like My 600lb Life, I get hungry for a snack. Then I feel bad because I feel like I shouldn’t be eating cookies when the person on TV can’t have any.
- When I watch shows about Ancient Egypt, and see people studying mummies, etc., I sometimes think- Will people thousands of years from now do an archeological dig of Ancient NY and study US? Will we be on some kind of TV show someday as ancient artifacts? I can see it now: Here is the tomb of the great Community Theater producer, Jen. I see her grave was robbed, because it was customary to be buried with sacred scores to musicals that were never returned to their rightful publishers…
In closing, I just want to wish everyone well during this time of uncertainty with the coronavirus outbreak. Some people are not worried, some people are panicking to the point of being ridiculous- but really- wash your hands and above all: Use common sense. Be good to each other, wash your damn hands and don’t touch your faces! I’ve heard that green beer and St; Joseph’s pastries help (not really- but they’ll be great ways to celebrate next week!).
Jennifer Angarano Ricci is a wife, mother & creative soul-searcher. She is a musician, artist, and baker, and runs her home business Baked By Jen, in addition to running her local community theater group. She loves to sing, create and help others and tries to connect all three passions whenever possible.